Apr/18/14
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generalbooty:

yeah so i slept with this dude last night and idk we were chatting a bit  during the sexy time and for some reason his birthday came up and i was like “wait 25th of september? DUDE me TOO, wtf thats such a coincidence” and he was like “really? we have the same birthday? are u fuckin with me?” and i just looked down at his penis literally inside my vagina and was like “well technically yeah” and he was like haha nice one and high fived me



Apr/18/14
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fuckyeah-nerdery:

Some people handle floods better than others.


Apr/18/14
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Apr/18/14
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jaclcfrost:

if you ever think my shorts are “too short” i want you to consider the following

  • they are called “shorts”
  • i look great


Apr/18/14
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atrueaboveatruebelow:

darksstars:

3spooky:

sometimes I forget that mermaid man and barnacle boy are humans that are the size of a squirrel

I…

SWEET JESUS HOW DID I NOT NOTICE THAT



Apr/18/14
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Apr/17/14
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steve-spaghetti:

renirabbit:

pizzalecki:

pkmnbreederbrianna:

togamijail:

chandra75:

im-sherlocked-in-my-mindpalace:

socially-awkward-supervillian:

Fun fact: Cheetahs only attack prey that runs

jesus that is good to know.

Yup, that’s the point you just stay still and let it do whatever the fuck it wants that doesn’t involved you getting eaten. 

REALLY FUN FACT for big cats cheetahs are fucking docile as shit
my grandfather ran a cheetah sanctuary in south africa and he’d just lie with them and sleep among them and they’d rub against him and chirp at him they’re big fucking babies

Another Fun Fact: Cheetahs are incredibly nervous animals. One of the (many) reason’s they’re going extinct is that cheetahs are so sensitive and nervous, some of them are literally too nervous to breed. Others will breed, but stress themselves out so much, they’ll lose their cubs. So zoos with breeding programs had to figure out how to make cheetahs comfortable enough to first of all, get laid and secondly - not spazz themselves into miscarrying.So what’d they do? They gave the cheetah’s their very own Service Dogs!The dogs make them feel safe, protected and secure!

AJHHHHFDDGHH SO PRECIOUS

this post just got so much better

THIS IS OFFICIALLY MY FAVOURITE POST


Apr/17/14
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Apr/17/14
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I’m not the girl your mother warns you about.
I won’t kiss your best friend or break your heart.
I won’t make you choose between what you love to do & me.
I’m not cold. I’m not reckless.

I’m the girl your father mentions when your mom’s not around.
I’m the girl that gets away.

I will love you more than anything.
I will kiss you when you cry.
I will stand by your side until you decide otherwise.

And you’re just like your father, so you will.

You’ll let me go & I won’t look back,
But you will.
I promise you, you will.

I’m that girl.

Despite my every effort, I’ve ended up exactly like my father. 

(via 5ft1)